Christian Spouse Swap

Christian Spouse Swap


There is nothing Christian about swapping spouses, right? Right! Jesus made it clear that marriage is for life between one man and one woman living together as one flesh. There isn’t room for another person in this equation. Nor is there an option for trading up.

But there is the absolute necessity for the same old husband and the same old wife to become two different people together (2 Corinthians 5:17) for the glory of God. And swapping the old person each spouse used to be for the new one in this sense is very Christian.


Adam’s sin cursed marriage for everyone everywhere. God pronounces the curse on marriage to Eve in Genesis 3:16, “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” The consequence of Adam’s sin is that his nature would be to “rule over” Eve, his wife. He would be domineering and harsh. And he would be negligently indifferent to her needs. He would be a passive coward. And so it continues with the sons of Adams today. But Jesus’ obedience redeems marriage for all who trust in him.

Jesus blesses marriage by changing the sons of Adam as husbands. Ephesians 5:22–33 paints the new picture. Husbands, in the role of Jesus, are to love their wives, who are in the role of the Jesus’ bride, the church. And instead of selfish domination we now see a husband loving, serving and cherishing his wife. We see that Adam has been swapped for Jesus.


Eve wasn’t without a flawed nature either as she was evicted from the garden. God told Eve, “your desire will be for your husband.” This may sound innocent and sweet, but it is a very dark and bitter pronouncement.

This same term, “desire” is also found in Genesis 4:7. There, it describes sin’s intention for an angry young man named Cain. “Desire” most accurately means “control.” The consequence of Eve’s sin for the future of marriage would be the innate tendency for a wife to control her husband. She would be fearful, distrusting, demanding, and manipulative. And so it continues with the daughters of Eve today.

But, again, Jesus’ righteousness changes everything. He redeems marriage by transforming the daughters of Eve. Selfish manipulation is gone. It is replaced by respect for and submission to her husband. A wife lives under the loving and sacrificial leadership of her husband just as the church does for her Savior. We see that Eve has been swapped for the bride of Jesus, the church.


There is very good news about new identities. They don’t result from doing more and trying harder. New identities are realized by faith alone in the person and work of Jesus Christ. A new identity is a gift from God. It is to be received not achieved. 2 Corinthians 5:17–18 states, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold; the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ, reconciled us to himself.”

The foundation of a Jesus-centered marriage isn’t first about doing. It is first about being. And you don’t have to find a new partner to have a good marriage. You need to be a new person in Christ by faith. And you need to love and accept the same spouse in his or her new identity. You can both enjoy a new marriage with the same spouse by embracing your new identities together in Jesus. Goodbye, Adam. Goodbye, Eve. Hello to Jesus and his bride.

Pastor Dave Bruskas 

One Response to “Christian Spouse Swap”

  1. Antony says:

    Its important to note that being a good husband and father starts with knowing who you are as a Son of God! If your objective is to live as Christ lived you can’t go wrong in relating to you wife, kids and church.

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